Friday, November 7, 2008

Being the Mom My Kids Deserve

Dana at Are We There Yet? has made me think about the question: What kind of Mom do my kids deserve? If I were to put a want ad in the paper for a Mom for my kids, what would be the qualifications? I so often have a hard time keeping my focus during the day. I'm easily distracted and often have a one-track mind. I find myself occasionally wondering how the time has gone so quickly, and realizing that I have not made time for my kids. I guess that probably sounds like an odd thing to say from someone who spends nearly all her time at home, but being at home and being focused on my boys are two different things.

Wanted: Mom for Noah and Micah.
Ability to . . .
walk into a messy boy's room and not nag.
discern the heart behind the action, then respond in wisdom and patience.
pray scripture over each boy daily.
model self-control.
correct without cutting down.
encourage the character, not just the actions.
use a gentle answer to turn away wrath.
model forgiveness.
stop your busy-ness and look each boy in the eye as he's speaking.
know their love language and fill their tank daily.
be their best cheerleader.
let them know you're on their side.
be in the Word and prayer daily so you're prepared to guide and correct in Christ-likeness.
ask forgiveness when necessary.
take every opportunity to point them to God.
model love in speech and actions.
be honest in all things great and small.

I'm sure more things will come to mind. But one thing that strikes me is that nothing on this list has to do with how well I'm homeschooling, how clean my house is, or how many vegetables my kids have eaten each day. While all those things are important and needful, I need this reminder that how I do these things and how I'm relating to my children while living our lives together is what ultimately matters.

Why this is so hard to keep in mind, I do not know. Why I get so wrapped up in my own selfish pursuits day by day is a mystery. But one thing I do know, is that it is Christ in me that makes me able to do all things, so I will not beat myself up over the past, but ask Him to come front and center in my life today and help me to be the Mom He desires for Noah and Micah.


Dana~Are We There Yet? said...

Very well put. Thanks for the link!

Lynn said...

This is my first time visiting. What a lovely post. It sounds like you are an amazing mom. Your boys are blessed! :) Keep up the great mothering work. You're right, it has nothing to do with how clean the house is or how many vegetables everyone's eating.